Shrek 2 (PC Game)
Allister: Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away, there lived a loveable ogre, and a beautiful princess. One day, the ogre and the lady met, and they fell in love. *'Donkey': Whoa, whoa, back it up there, Chauncey. *'Allister': It's Allister. *'Donkey': Allister? What kind of name is that? You must have got kicked a lot at school. *'Allister': I am trying to tell a story. *'Donkey': Well, you're telling it wrong. Look here. Once upon a time there was an ogre, a princess, and a noble, handsome gorgeous... donkey! *'Allister': Oh, excuse me for getting the donkey! Ahem...so one day, the ogre and the lady met, and they fell in love. *'Donkey': ...with the donkey. *'Allister': Evil forces to come between them, but as the script here says, love conquers all. *'Donkey': And before they knew it, they were hitched. The bouquet was delicious. *'Allister': They returned home from a long honeymoon to find their faithful friend, their ever-present, constant companion, and Irritatingly loyal donkey pal awaiting their arrival. *'Shrek': Donkey! We're back! *'Donkey': So soon! *'Shrek': What in the name of all the king's horses has been going on around here?! *'Donkey': What's been going on? I'll tell you what's been going on!...All kinds of crazy things have been going on! That's what! Get a load of this! Soldiers are trying to arrest the fairytale creature again! Can you believe it? You've got to rip this poster down, Shrek! Man, we've got to protect our friends! And, Shrek, these posters ain't the half of it. Look at this! Coins, just floating in the air! And we've got to pick them up, man; we're going to need all the coins we can get. They're all over the place too. Over here. Over there. Up in the air! There are some even hidden in the crates. And look at THIS! When you jump on these lilypads - WHOO! - you bounce! And then we got energy bars, floating in space! WHY?! Why are they here?! I mean, they taste all like rattlesnake and they make you fell all powered up...but still, you know... Yes, that's right: Hero Energy Bars for the Hero everyone. Giving Heroes that extra energy boost since ... well, last year. It's kind of spooky they're just hanging in the mid-air like that. Huhhh. They're giving me heebie-jeebies! Oh and, by the way, we're going to Far Far Away for your wedding ball. *'Fiona': Uh...Our what? *'Donkey': Your wedding ball! Invitation came while you were gone. Oh, I did forget to mention that? My bad. But we can't leave until you get rid of all this hoodoo-voodoo! So c'mon. Let's get a move on. Time's a wasting. We got a wedding ball to clipperty-clop to. Go to it, boy! *'Fiona': Uh...Okay...I guess I need to pack... *'Shrek': Oh! And one other thing... *'Fiona': DONKEEEEEY!! *'Donkey': ...I really haven't had the chance to tidy up with all these bright, tinkly distractions. What was that? *'Shrek': Donkey!!! *'Donkey': Now come on, Shrek! Don't get hung up on the details! You've got to get that poster down, man. And grab all the coinage on the way. We're going to need beacoup bankroll for Far Far Away, so make sure you get them all! To jump on the lily pad, hit the control key or your right mouse button while your running around. Walking through water really kind of slows things down. It'd be way faster if you just jump across the lily pads. So c'mon, hop to it. And check out your Farquuad punching bag? Give it the old one two wam-bam-hu-ha-chu and rake in your reward! Punch is face by clicking your left mouse button! If you see a high ledge that's just out of reach, run up to it and you'll climb up automatically. Yeah, it's weird isn't it? If you can jump here, you can grab a hold of those vines. Alright, lookin' sharp. Now use your left and right arrows to shimmy along the vine. When you're drop off, hit the down arrow. To make it over to that dilapidated bridge, you'll need to do a double jump. Just lick your right mouse button twice. Here's the trick to double jumping. Click your right mouse button once to jump and then when you're the highest point of your jump, click the right mouse button again. You'll see - it's easy when you get the hang of it. Hey, with a little practice, you'll be double jumping in no time. See all those crates? You can smash them to toothpicks by clicking your left mouse button. Oh, look, look: there's four leaf clover! But you're going to have to get that later. You can't reach it from here, believe me. Jumping on that sparkly lily pad will fly you right over those nasty briars. Punch through those boards with your left mouse button. Keep your eyes peeled for these Hero Bars, Shrek. They'll give you a health boost. And they're nougat-ey! *'Roy': Hey, I'm Roy, your save fairy. If you see me flying around, run up to me and I'll save your game. Really sparks your sense of wonder, don't it. You made it. *'Donkey': Stand in front of this lever and hit your left mouse button to pull it. Break through those boards to get that four leaf clover. Usually, you have to hunt around in secret areas to find them and they're not easy to get but once you do, they'll increase your health capacity. So go for it! Shrek, look! It's a FGM Drive Through, where they sell magic potions and whatnot. They've been popping up everywhere. You've seen the commercials, right? *'Shrek': We should stock up for the road. *'Donkey': Yeah, here's that rotten poster I was telling you about. Click your left mouse button to rip it down! Leave no poster untorn! Rumor is, somebody's offering a reward for people that rip down three of these posters. Hey! You should start a collection. Probably he worth something one day. You did it, Shrek! Everything's back to normal.Who ordered the carriage? I don't have to tip this guy, do I? *'Fiona': I did. Far Far Away is...so very far away. Everything is packed and ready to go. Ready to meet my parents? *'Shrek': Um, sure. *'Fiona': Don't worry, they'll love you. *'Donkey': Yeah, Shrek, they'll love you. I mean love you. What's there not to love? *'Shrek': (Sighs) *'Donkey': We're going on a adventure, we're going on a adventure. We could be more than going on a really, really, really long road trip with me? *'Shrek': Uhhh. A root canal? Uhhh. Having my rose hairs plucked out one by one? *'Donkey': Are we there yet? How bout now? I was just kidding. Seriously, though...now? You know what I've been thinin'? We should start a band! Hey, that reminds me, who brought oats? *'Fiona': Shrek. Doesn't this reek of an ambush? *'Donkey': Actually that might be me. hat wedding invitation's kind of coming back on me. Sorry. *'Shrek': Donkey! *'Donkey': Yeah... Sorry, Shrek! Hey, look! That dude just ran off with our wheel! *'Shrek': I'll go take a look... *'Donkey': Shrek, please don't go out there. You heard what she said. Something, something, ambush! *'Shrek': Relax, Donkey. I'm an ogre. Unless you know a four-legged beast who could carry all our luggage? *'Donkey': Shrek, get out there and find that wheel! And hurry! And don't worry trees fall all the time, everyday. You'll be fine! *'Fiona': Bandits! Shrek, let me help! *'Donkey': No! Please don't leave me, I'm really losin' it here. Besides, Shrek can handle it. Watch. Click on your left mouse button when you want to punch something! If bandits hit you, they'll steal your coins. Just clock'em good and get your money back. Click your mouse left button twice to do a double punch! Left mouse. Two times. C'mon, Shrek. Click on the left mouse button three times to do a combo punch! Don't hold back with these guys! Give 'em what for! You need to get our wheel back so we can get a move on! Ooooh, Shrek, you showed them! Yeah, those bandits didn't stand a chance against you! First it was BAM! Then it was KAPOW! Then it was, "I can't feel my legs, I can't feel my legs!- *'Shrek': Well, the wheel's back on. Guess we can resume this magical journey. *'Donkey': Hey, Shrek, you're looking a little green round the gills man. Here, try a box of these. Maybe we can find some more of that stuff later. Category:Video Games